available.

i keep toying with the idea of online dating {gasp!}. i've typed e-h-a-r-m-o-n-y dot com into my browser exactly two times in the past month. eharmony, you ask? because if i'm going to do it, i'm really going to do it. no sense in wasting any time on the casual and free. let's just get down to business, people!

twice my fingers have opened a new tab and hesitantly started typing the e...h...a...r... and i am filled with both excitement and doubt. oh, the potential... the satisfaction of taking matters into my own hands is exhilarating, while clinging onto the idea of meeting someone organically is still all-consuming.

layered on top of that is a stigma about online dating that many in our society have yet to release, me included. when people speak about it, it's always done so in a whisper. but there should be no shame in it, my loves.

even so, i am consistently bombarded with, oh, everyone online dates! i know so many people who've met online and are now married! with children! {eeek! i just want a little romance}. and yet to every success story, i counter it with... oh, they're college sweethearts! these two met at a bar. it was a set-up...

oh, what to do...? what do to...?

i can't quite seem to get past step one - that silly welcome screen with the most naturally beautiful blonde woman {where i only end up entering name: gina. sex: female.}. while i have no idea what the fill in the blanks of step two may be, i thought i'd take a stab on the place i feel most comfortable writing. here. then maybe i'll do it for real.

so, ready go.

i like to hold hands. especially when we're driving. is that a silly ask? i think so. but there's something about about the sexiness of your hand touching - even my knee - while we are in transit that i simpy cannot resist.

i prefer walking on the inside of the street, protected. and see, it's the gentlemanly thing to do. your mother taught you well.

i wake up early, despite my diligent attempts at sleeping in. but, with you, i'd like to linger. weekends especially, please make me stay in bed. unless of course i drag you to yoga which is one hundred percent likely. but you secretly love it, and usually comply.

i'm not your typical twenty-six year old. i prefer cozy. they say you should be getting all your crazy out in your twenties. well, not this girl.

wine, candlelight, and pink peonies are only three of the dozens of keys to my heart. 

we balance each other out, you + me. you make me calm and comfy and i, you. because that's what makes a partnership great, don't you think? finding the right balance. and laughter. not a day goes by where we don't find ourselves smiling from ear to ear as laughter erupts from deep within. you know, the uninhibited kind.

i like perfect grammar. and a man who is good at his core, because like i've quoted before, when you're good at your core—really, truly, honestly good—love comes easy.*

i want the real deal. genuine, all-consuming, crazy, unconditional, exciting, best-friend love. i'm also kind of a beginner at this stuff. so, maybe you'll go at my pace and we'll honor the path we're both on, the cards we've been dealt, and then we can live happily ever after.

that's all. but see, it's really only the beginning.

no matter what i decide to do, at least putting it out there in this big 'ol universe is a start. sometimes when you ask, you shall receive. and sometimes, life surprises you. as it turns out, that's when it's the sweetest.

*i've used this quote twice now. found over here. gosh, i need to send her a note so we can really become friends. #bloggercrush
**loveys found here, here, and here.