novelty.

it really is all happening, loves. one-way ticket booked. movers scheduled, check. only five more sleeps in this city by the bay. i am overwhelmed with an abundance of love from those near and dear to my heart, and their surprises and generosity over the past several days are unlike anything i could have imagined.

if i am absent from this space in the next couple weeks it is mostly because i'm occupied with the move. there are so many things i want to tell you and document for myself so i hope to be in and out more than i anticipate, but should i be unable to, i wanted to share this video.

a dear new yorker gal pal sent it to me in december two thousand eleven. a time when she had all intentions of making a move out west. but, guess who is beating her to it with a move out east? i had just paid her a visit in the big apple and upon returning home, this video was in my inbox with a note: this is what i watch to remind myself how amazing nyc is, i thought you would appreciate it...

oh how excited this video makes me to embrace a new city. to get lost. to explore. to learn. to take in so many things for the very first time. there's something to say for novelty, and it's quite clear my whole being has been craving it for quite some time now. 

i think i'll also take with me a lyric from the song called we don't eat by james vincent mcmorrow. 

so if i were you, i'd have a little trust.

so, here's to trust and new beginnings. and, let's be honest, friends, i couldn't have done it without you.

romantical.

one of the things i looked most forward to crossing off the 'ol bucket list {version i & version ii} was cavallo point. truth be told, it's one of the most romantical little spots in all of the san francisco bay area, so i highly recommend taking your hunny boo to the outdoor patio and plopping yourself on the couches in front of the fire pit with a glass of vino in hand. i'd go at sunset on a clear night, and i guarantee sparks will fly {bet you didn't think you'd be getting dating advice on this friday morning, did you? well, you are welcome}. if i could add just two more cents, i want to throw it out there that it's the perfect third date in my expert dating opinion.

anyhow, i was lucky enough to have not one, but two dates upon our cavallo point visit and now we can officially go like this...

sit by the fire by the bar at cavallo point

so satisfying!

thank you for coming with me!

lists are a necessary part of my life these days. i opt for the stickies app on the mac so i can easily write random thoughts that pass through my consciousness during the day. or at night when i toss and turn, and open and close, open and close my computer oh so many times. i've always pinned myself for a fairly decent sleeper, but i guess not in periods of stress when the brain simply won't turn off.

what a fun transition phase this is becoming. i feel caught between the present and the future, all the while trying to remain calm and at peace. well, sometimes, it's not so peaceful up in this joint. after all, it's hard to stay rooted when you are in the process of an up-root. oh, the details! and oh the little bumps in the road this universe is throwing at me like stolen wallets and run-ins with the law. i'm trying to dig deep to find the lesson in it all. because, there must be a lesson! 

i remember a dear friend told me once, it's not rainbows and sunshine all the time, geans. well, you're right, it's not. oh life, let's work together, okay? you and me. go team.

so tell me, how do you handle stress?

*photo credit on first photo: all jamie {or are we calling her ansel!?}

create.

we walked. and we walked and talked. we chased the evening light all the way home, but somehow it felt like it was following us. during our last few moments on this clear and still sunday night stroll, she asked me what are you going miss most about your life in san francisco? 

thank you for asking is the first thing that came out of my mouth. because i could genuinely thank minnie for everything she says, since it's all just so perfect.

well, this, for one. and i'm going to miss the simple things. like walks to work. and my daily routine. and yoga. and quality time with the people i love. and my apartment. and just how content my life is here.

and she replied, but you will get all of those things there...

that's when i realized that it doesn't take much to create a content life for yourself. you can take the girl out of her foundation, but you can't take the foundation out of the girl. because all she needs is just a few good friends who nurture her soul. a solid routine filled with inspiring work. a cozy place to call home. good health, endorphins, and love. the thing is, we create the love, don't we? so let's create it, no matter where we are.

*photo taken on my iphone5, enhanced with picfx.

sacred.

all of this moving business is really going to my head. it's like i've stepped out of my body and am watching a story that is my life unfold. as a result, i'm witnessing all of the main characters that play important roles in this glorious novel-o-mine. it's fun and interesting and, to be honest, quite humbling. i am learning that every single person who is apart of our lives {or has been apart of our lives} is for a reason. our relationships with others, both good and bad, are part of our stories on purpose whether we know it yet or not. always remember that. 

i am grateful for the connections that have brought me together with so many i wouldn't have had the opportunity to be lucky enough to get to know. i try to always always give that gift back to the universe by merging lives and making connections. i believe our stories are richer and sweeter the more good people we have in them, don't you think?

so, in this biography of sorts, that i am observing as of late, one character stands out in particular. her name is stacie. we'll call her the protagonist's wiser-older-sister-that-she-never-did-have. and for this self-proclaimed sister-seeking main character, this particular sisterhood was a given from the start.

i knew it during our first slumber party when i opted out of partying with the kids my own age. instead, i stayed in with stace and it was on this night that she gave me some of the best advice i've ever received, even to this day... i think life can be really simple. some people just make it really really hard for themselves. it was in context of course, but i knew at that very moment that stace and i were destined to be sisters. 

i would not be where i am today without her. and you guys, this is not a joke. the course of my life would be completely different. please don't let that sound dramatic, it's simply the truth. and if i was on a different course that one would be great too, i'm just sayin'...

i got my first job in digital advertising because of stacie. i learned about the blog universe because of stacie. i got built-in everyday advice about navigating your twenties because of stacie. i gained confidence and courage i didn't know i had because of stacie. i became fully prepared for pregnancy because of stacie. i met wonderfully amazing people i wouldn't have otherwise met because of stacie. see what i mean? pretty prominent character in this story. because. because. because. of stacie. of stacie. of stacie. i promise i won't use those words throughout the remainder of this post. but, you get the picture, a lot of things in my life would not be happening if i did not know the one and only... stacie.

no one. and i repeat no one knows me better than her. she is my daily rock. she lets me talk. and talk and talk for hours. with no filter, of course. and she listens. and she is my biggest fan. how did i ever get so lucky to have this angel by my side? i am an older sister myself, but i swear in another lifetime {because most of the time i believe in those} i must have been the wiser-older-sister-that-someone-never-did-have, and the universe gifted it right on back to me.

stace, you are truly the most pivotal character in my story. i am leaps and bounds beyond grateful for you. thank you, from the bottom of my heart. for everything. for the inspiration. for the encouragement. for the advice. for every last ounce of energy and love you have ever given me. it's made me who i am. and you know what? because of you, i am a better version of myself than i ever thought possible. our sisterhood is sacred to me. i love you. forever.

particularly.

i walked my usual route to the bus stop this evening and something felt a little different than usual. no music. no phone calls. just the sound of my boots. click clack click clack. one foot in front of the other.

it's not a particularly scenic walk. in fact, there are parts that are downright sketchy, but something about it charmed me tonight. i found myself getting all nostalgic and thinking oh, i have to try that boba tea place on the corner where all of the cool asian teenagers hang out. 

it's a mishmash of characters, this walk. the artsy cigarette smokers lingering outside of vesuvio. the nomadic guitar player in the alley hoping for some spare change. the backpack-wearing tourists flowing in and out of city lights book store. the franchino himself sitting outside of his restaurant with his feather-adorned fedora and thick italian accent. the late night coffee-drinking lovers at café greco. the many many hostesses greeting every passing stranger: would you like to join us for dinner tonight?

anyhow, i stood on the corner of broadway and columbus and it just felt beautiful. i took in the moment. the tacky neon lights against the clear dusk-ridden sky felt more beautiful than they ever have before. and i felt particularly grateful. like i was really going to miss this place. miss this simple routine walk to washington square park in all it's vibrant and quirky glory. whether i realized it or not it'd become my walk home and very much apart of me.

and so i must ask, is there anything you feel that is apart of you?

*pictures all taken on the iphone5 and edited via picfx.

love letter to san francisco.

not too long ago there was an email exchange with my very talented friend lisa. it started something like this...

can i hire you to do a photo shoot on it's all happening?

and then i found out i was moving for sure and it turned into a happy memory shoot caught on video about all of the places i heart {literally} in san francisco... the ones that have been important to me over the past five years. we'll call them heartmarks {aka landmarks}.

we planned in advance to shoot on a saturday afternoon, and even had a very important early morning business meeting to sketch out our ideas like actual creative bloggers. it felt like the real deal!

so, i can't wait any longer to share this video with you, my beloved readers. without further ado, here it is in all of it's glory...

you can find my written love letter to san francisco here, but, see, in this post i really just want to thank lisa. we are so different, and yet, inherently so so similar. those are the most interesting and unique kinds of friendships, don't you think? i feel obligated to share an email written to her from her own dad upon sending him her latest work: the love letter to san francisco video...

monkey,
this is absolutely fantastic!!!!!!!!! probably the best work you have ever done. it captures the theme, mood, joy, and excitement with superb photographic background and soulful music. this video should serve as ample proof and demonstration of your ingenuity and creativity. keep it as a reference model - it shouts out professionalism. it's unbelievable that you did this by yourself. i would guess that another shop would charge $5,000 for this kind of work and probably use a lot of clip art. no doubt in my mind that you're destined for some aspect of film/video making. i would like to see you pursue this path. look up some schools - i'll pay the tuition.
lots of love and admiration,
dad

you can't beat the words of a proud father. is it just me, or does this note bring you to tears? it so perfectly sums up lisa's talent and selfless nature. i am beyond grateful that our careers brought us together on this so-called life path. lis, you choose your friends wisely, this i know for sure, and i am so lucky that you put your kind energy and attention into me. i can't thank you enough for this brilliant work of art you've created that i will absolutely cherish forever and ever. thank you for being brave enough for all of us and pursuing your own creative path, and for continuing to inspire me to push my creative limits {no idea is a bad idea, right?}. the world doesn't know what it's in for yet, lis. you've only scratched the surface of sharing your greatness with the world. please remember, no matter where life takes us, i will always be one of your biggest fans.

all my love and {like your daddio} admiration,
elks

ps. see more of lisa's videos here.

honor.

you know that game you play as a girl… if i was getting married tomorrow, these would be my bridesmaids... {oh i hope that's not just me}.

well, to be honest, the moment i met alexis, i knew she'd be by my side forever. there was no question we would not have each other through every single phase of life... college, traveling, twenty-something-and-figuring-it-out, someday marriage and babies, and so on and so forth. she taught me what it means to have a true best friend and, more importantly, what it means to be one. we all need our very own alexis.

she recently came to san francisco {possibly one last hurrah for a long while} and moments before she arrived, i got a very special package in the mail...

she asked my to be her maid of honor! and what a true honor it is. i am proudly wearing a little something on my right hand in preparation to be one of her right hand gals.

to be completely honest, i am not fully up to speed on maid of honor duties. after all, it is my first. all i know is that i feel blessed to be apart of her experience, and to celebrate her lifelong love.

here's to many more years of firsts and friendship. i love you.

and ps. sweet readers, please do not hesitate to share any moh duties...

*maid of honor pic found on our pinboard.

the truth of the matter.

i've been lucky enough to get to go to deer valley for three winters running {once i even squeezed in two trips in one season}. and let me please put extra emphasis on the word lucky here. i do not use this word lightly because it is an absolute privilege to be able to spend the weekend in such a breathtakingly beautiful place with, in my opinion, some of the best gals on the face of the planet.

my memories of utah prior to this said girls weekender {which usually occurs during sundance} are mostly filled with summertime family reunions. and my attachment to utah is mostly due to my love for mormons, and through the eyes of a few usual blogger suspects. exhibit a. dooce b. pink peonies and c. the jacksons.

the point of this post, however, is to tell you how incredibly grateful i am for girlfriends. i'm learning that the older we get, the busier our lives become. each of us is pursuing her dreams, falling in love, and moving to new cities… away from the one we all once found ourselves in. some of us are veering a little off our planned courses, but it's okay, because we continue to move toward what makes us happy.

the truth of the matter is that we're all in this together. i am blessed to have such rad girls around me. i love witnessing their journeys, and i am grateful they are witnessing mine.

just thought i'd share a few moments i captured throughout the past seventy two glorious hours in which too much wine was consumed, too many frozen pizzas were heated up, and too many dance routines were performed {actually, never too many of those!}. here goes...

"my office."

hair-caught-in-blowdryer-fiasco + good friends + boot fitting

dinner @ grappa. note to self: be more aware when you step into the snow in heels, we don't need anymore falls.

taslisker, aka heaven on earth.

st. regis for lunch.

outdoor pool time.

good morning.

our spot.

shoop! shoop! {right before our fingers froze off}.

#whencanweaprés {weekend hashtag}.

utah sunsets.

montage spa.

i love the twinkling trees.

and for your viewing pleasure, here's a video taken our first year at sundance entitled rose v. mallow. and, while i'm at it, here's the foundation of our killer dance routine caught on video.

well, while we're on the subject, dolls, what's your favorite girls weekend?

xoxo.

steady.

all i want to do is write.

the words take a while to come. the right words, that is. a whole long while. but eventually they come. and the floodgates open and inspiration hits. and it pours. like a rush of white light shining through my consciousness. steady now, sweet words 'o mine i want to tell them.

i was on a plane this morning and it dawned on me that writing is a whole lot like flying. and, not just any flying. the early morning kind.

it starts out dark. we are a whole mess of sleepiness and confusion. and then before we know it, we're soaring high above the world below us. we enter a universe that exists only within ourselves, above the clouds. our own safe, quiet, and protected universe where we must surrender control. the light {like the words} seeps in slowly, a swirl of all sorts of magical reds… and blues… and oranges. and then there is only brightness. we shine. we are blinded by the white light. we float, enduring the often bumpy ride, but we remain still within ourselves.

we are steady.

before we know it, we are back down to earth again amongst the noise. it's here we wait for the next time we get to soar, all the while grateful for the journey.

i was telling a friend the other day i wish i could write more. to feel that focused and mindful consciousness a little more often. maybe i need to take up flying.

tell me, as a writer, what is your experience like?

*song inspiration for this post: ben howard. pics from my iphone.

a-shiftin'

i used to be completely and utterly obsessed with yoga. key word here: used to. and it breaks my heart to write that. it really does. i would skip engagements to make it to class. i would force myself to wake up in the early morning hours to hear my favorite quote from cara. i would plan my vacation schedule around retreats. i would rush home from work to make it to anna. i would dabble in other studios to get in more and more and more yoga and yoga and yoga. all.the.time.

and you know what? i don't regret one single second of it. because it made me who i am today, and it allowed me to know some of the most amazingly inspiring people i have ever met. extensive hours practicing was what i needed at the time as it fulfilled some sort of deep hunger i so badly needed to satiate. yoga helped me to create space for me to exist and for others to exist with me. lately, though, i'm realizing what is so perfectly beautiful about yoga, is that it's always there. no matter how you want to connect with it, no matter how much or how little you need it, it's there.

i had a plan to get certified as a teacher in twenty thirteen. it was the natural next step and seemed obvious in my eyes. i had already mentally forked over the money and i was prepared to make ends meet.

then i got injured. and i cracked the root of my body. and i decided to uproot myself to new york {oddly enough, none of which would have happened without the other}.

and now, {sigh}. now is this whole other yoga experience that is oh so very different and oh so very new. i find myself barely making it through class. maybe stopping in once a week. maybe not. i still love it just the same, but it does not resonate with my body the way that it used to. i don't desperately need it as i once did. for now.

things are a-shiftin' in this big 'ol universe, friends. my yoga practice tells me so. the lesson here is moderation. just like all things in life we need balance. funny how i learned to find balance through the actual physical act of balancing itself.

oh yoga, there will be everchanging forms of you. new practices. new studios. new teachers. new commitments. i am grateful for our continually evolving relationship. namaste.

ps. so tell me, what is your yoga practice telling you?

*photo credit: lbophotos

merrymaking.

so i wrote this bucket list {see here & here} not too long ago and, boy, does it seem like it's becoming a mad race to the finish line {february second, by the way}. actually, no, i take that back. not too mad. more like a game i kind of wish i had been playing all along.

i am in absolute awe of how many takers i have willing to participate in this bucketlistgame with me. if this was the game of life, my car would be squeezed full with pink and blue heads. they'd have to double buckle! i'd even want to put in a special request for a super stretch limo. but you know what they say? the more the merrier. and, i am so incredibly content merrymaking my way through san francisco. and see, that's the lesson in the bucketlist. the one i want to stick with me {and all of us} forever as we open new chapters, start new years, and, well, wake up every morning.

life is too short not to merrymake. find people who you love doing it with and who love doing it with you. the ones who should be by your side, will be. it's that simple. don't worry about the rest.

so, dear lovely red-lipstick wearing and martini-drinking ladies,

thank you for accompanying me on a night out on the town at bix. it's official, we can do this now: martini's and dinner at bix {can you tell i love the strike out!?}. and i have you to thank for it. thank you for pretending we were in an alleyway in paris. for the gabbing over cocktails {of course i got the manhattan!}. for indulging in history lessons from stuey. for sharing bites of your truffle burger. and, most of all for loving me. somehow i got lucky enough to have you three as guardian angels. each protecting me in her own unique way.

i do not say this lightly. i say it with full, genuine intention... what would i do without you?

all my love,
geenz, sweetie, puddin'

write like a motherf*cker.

there are some incredibly rad women on this plant. many of which i've written about here... oprah, anna quindlen, and brené brown to name a few. and among them is ms. cheryl strayed. i picked up her book tiny beautiful things back in the fall and read the majority of it while i was galavanting abroad {aka on long flights}. she also writes the ever popular wild, which is on my to-read-as-soon-as-possible list.

this past sunday i was fortunate enough to see her speak in person and she was as captivating in real life as she is in her books.

cheryl spoke with such authenticity and stoicism. that's what i love about writers - especially those who write memoirs - they are comfortable with vulnerability by owning their words, feelings, and life experiences. the thing is, someone can always relate with pain and raw emotion.

i couldn't help but want to be on stage as the interviewer. do you have a writing sanctuary? what is your writing routine? how do you create titles to your work? what is your favorite part about being a writer? alas, just an audience member. someday! oh someday i'll get to have conversations with the greats.

one of my favorite {and subtle} things she did on several occasions was refer to herself as an artist. and that's what writers are, yes? beautiful and eloquent word stringing artists. may you bring out your inner artist and as cheryl says, write like a motherf*cker.

manifest.

all we talk about around here these days is moving and list-making. so it seems. yaaaawn! i am certain i can give you more. i need to.

it's twenty thirteen. wow. i kind of forgot to stop and think about that. like really think about it. i am too busy playing and planning instead of reflecting on this beautiful moment. twenty twelve was filled with goodness. there was some bad, of course, but you know a year has been good when you can look back at it and smile... tell it thank you for happening, and watch it slowly saunter into the distance. i hope all the years of my life are like this, remembered as good.

i read this post i wrote exactly one year ago and almost broke down into tears. all i can think of is that i did it. i lived how i wanted to live. and while we're all just works in progress, we're also manifesting our best selves.

i can't stop thinking about this word, manifesting. it came to me from an incredibly kind comment from an instagram friend on my big news post and quite frankly, i can't quite get it out of my head. it reads, love it! big congrats! manifesting your dreams :)

at first glance i thought, who me? and the more it sunk in, the more i believed it. yes, me. 

after reading this post by my sweet friend on her blog, i can't help but think manifest just might be my word for twenty thirteen.

m a n i f e s t.

make happen. live fully. embody. exude. be open. warmth. love. express. proclaim. show yourself to the world.

...all words and phrases i vow to remember this year. all while occupying a new space in completely new situations with entirely new people. ready, go!

may we all manifest our dreams this year, sweet peas.

*photo 1 | 2

bucket lists volume ii

happy twenty thirteen, loves.

somehow i've been busy with what i'm referring to as bucketlisting. the act of crossing things off one's bucket list. it's rather fun, and i truly can't believe it took me this long to write one. i am so grateful that the anticipation of moving has made me embrace life a little more fully. funny how when things become impermanent, venturesome spirits are born. see, turns out i am already learning oh-so-much and i'm not even in the big apple yet.

let's get down to business. where are we?

volume i.

adventures done and done:

a proper day in the wine country
hike the tennessee valley trail again {not on the original, but should have been}

dine about town done and done.

a cozy night at tony's pizza

speakeasy style at bourbon & branch

additions to the bucket list {volume ii}

row a boat in stow lake

sit by the fire at the bar at cavallo point

okay, i think that does it. if i can cross volume i and ii off i'll be one lucky girl. and, might i add, none of this would be possible without the amazing people i have in my life. to you, i am forever indebted. and i can't thank you enough for wanting to spend time and play.